For 19 years there has been a very clear path set for me. After Elementary School you go to Middle School. Then you start your sophomore year... then your junior... then your senior. Then suddenly you graduate and have all these doors open to you to choose a college. But HELLO it doesn't end there! I made the decision to come to BYU-Idaho (and I am so happy I did) and now I am just discovering more and more and MORE options for the next adventure in my life! How fun.
For a while I thought it would be wise for me to get on Fast Grad, push it hard, and graduate ASAP.
Then I started seeing posters everywhere for the Disney College Program that my big sister did. Holy cow- that would be a dream come true!!
Then I thought about transferring to BYU Provo after my fun here....
And you know... marriage is never really out of the question. But so far nobody is cutting it :)
I've ALWAYS wanted to do a semester abroad! Some time in Europe would be awesome.
Basically, there are so many options. Probably about fifty roads to choose from! Nothing was seeming quite right, (you may be thinking I should just be content with what I'm doing now.. I am a planner folks. I like to have something to be working towards!) so I prayed about it.
Then suddenly I was sitting in my Book of Mormon class. My teacher was talking about the Gathering of Israel and I felt such a burning in my chest. I cried and thought, "Oh my heavens. Maybe I should serve a mission." Right then my professor said, "And if any of you are having those stirrings in your soul to serve, GO!" That hit me hard. He was talking to me. I spoke to him afterwards and said I would pray about it and try to get an answer at conference and he said, "I think you have already received your answer. Go forward with it and the Lord will stop you if it isn't right." And so I did! I went to the temple and fasted and prayed. I still sought answers during conference and set an appointment with my Bishop. I never received a huge confirmation during conference, but it feels so good and right for me to serve! I have always considered serving a mission, but kind of pushed it aside because everybody is doing it nowadays and I just didn't know if it was for me. After I made the decision to serve I started second guessing myself and my answer. I thought that maybe those feelings were just my emotions or my digestive system trying to deal with the gluten I ate. I really began to doubt that I had received an answer and started to pray again to know what to do. Sister Summerhays reminded me that sometimes when we have been given an answer, He will not give it again. This talk from Elder Scott explains it perfectly:
For us to grow, we need to trust our ability to make correct decisions. We need to do what we feel is right. In time, He will answer. He will not fail us.
“Behold, thou knowest that thou hast inquired of me and I did enlighten thy mind; and now I tell thee these things that thou mayest know that thou hast been enlightened by the Spirit of truth.” (D&C 6:14–15; italics added.)
If you feel that God has not answered your prayers, ponder these scriptures—then carefully look for evidence in your own life of His having already answered you.
To help each of us recognize answers given, the Lord said: “If you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things.
“Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter?” (D&C 6:22–23; italics added).
The Lord provides further insight by counseling us to study a problem out in our mind and then to ask if it be right: “If it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.
“But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought.” (D&C 9:8–9; italics added.)
I feel so strongly that preparing for a mission is the road Heavenly Father would have me take at this time. My dad said wisely that we should always be preparing for the call. That way, whatever the Lord calls us to do, we will be ready. So that is just what I am going to do! I am trusting that those feelings and promptings I had were from my Heavenly Father. I am going to spend time preparing myself for the call and hopefully head out after Winter Semester (so April-ish). I will let the Lord guide me and be prepared for whatever He would have me do- even if that means this "mission prep" is just to prepare me to get married or whatever He has in store for me. I am so grateful for this gospel and for my testimony. I know that I have been blessed with strong faith and experiences that have strengthened it. I know that there are specific people somewhere in the world that I can touch. I know that through Heavenly Father, I can do anything. I know He has a plan for me- I have a purpose! A divine potential and I can reach it through Him. I have a work to do on this earth and there is no way I could sit back when I have this knowledge in me! There is nothing holding me back and I have so much to share. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints brings SUCH joy and happiness into my life. I feel so close to my Savior and I know of my worth. I want everyone to know that they can repent and CHANGE through the gospel! That is huge!!! We can become like our Heavenly Father!! We are so blessed and There is no way to be happy without the gospel. Goodness, I can't wait to share it with everybody. The Church is true. And I am so incredibly grateful for all the experiences I have been having. I bear you my testimony in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
Sending my love from the Burg.
xoxo
